What can you say in response to “what are you looking for in a relationship”, is one of the most feared questions for many people in their search for an appropriate partner.
The process of dating is already difficult enough to be without needing to figure out what could be thought of as predetermined answers.
In the end, it’s all about you in addition to finding someone else who understands the same, isn’t it?
Simply put, simple it is true! This is the main concept behind dating. Find someone who truly loves you, and then reciprocate these feelings. At the end of the day, relationships are about growth and mutual respect, and love.
Then, why does this feel like an interrogation at the beginning? What are these invasive questions regarding:
- Who are you?
- What are your preferred choices?
- What are you doing to enjoy your time?
- What do you want in a partner?
- Do you wish to be married?
- Do you wish to have children?
- And many more!
So, don’t take it negatively. You’re both seeking to share your lives with someone else, and it’s normal to want to discover if this person deserves your attention.
Although it could give an impression that you’re applying to an employment opportunity, however, the person applying is looking to get to know you better, just as you’d like to know them.
Here’s a suggestion for when you meet your partner or your lover. If you’re looking to have more meaningful conversations (even enjoyable! ), download Better Topics. It’s a fun and free couple’s game available for two platforms: iOS as well as Android.
Do I Need To Make Myself Sound Appealing?
This kind of thinking and self-doubt is the result of your own creation. Because finding the perfect person is not an easy job it’s tempting to be as wide as you can in your descriptions of yourself (especially when you’re on the internet dating).
When you’ve assembled a larger number of people who are interested then it’s easy to select the one that’s the best for you, right?
As many people as you attempt to impress with statements such as “I’m a fun person looking for like-minded individuals” and “I’m easy going and relaxing to be around”, the more trouble you’re creating for yourself.
If you’re talking about general, broad things will certainly be in a situation where lots of people would like to get together.
In the same way that they don’t really know about who you are, You won’t be able to tell either.
The only thing it can be a source of frustration is wasted time. It is also possible to receive messages that cause you to give up on dating completely.
If you just bite your teeth and decide to keep going from date to regardless of how uncomfortable or awkward they may be eventually, you’ll meet someone.
Why should we go in this manner, when there’s a more effective method to locate a partner?
What To Actually Do
You’re not sure what to say to “what are you looking for in a relationship” when you’re requested by prospective partners. Did you take the time to answer the question by yourself first?
The earlier you’re sure of exactly what you’re after then the quicker you’ll be able to convey your message clearly.
Take the time to let go of any thoughts like “I’ll know when I find them” and commit to some reflection. Monogamy, polygamy, or some other casual thing, or perhaps you’re looking to get married to someone?
What is marriage material? Kids? How many? The time is limited Don’t just wait for something to occur; make it happen!
After you’ve had this discussion with yourself, then do you need to “put the pen to the paper” in the manner it is? Then comes the most exciting part! It is possible to write… anything you’d like!
There’s no limit in this case since once again you’re not applying for a job and you’re not aiming to achieve 5 stars out of 5. You’re looking for one who accepts you and loves you for what you’re worth.
No limitations No undertones, make your explanation of who you are as well as the things you’d like to achieve clear and easy.
If you’re trying to figure out what you’re looking at in the relationship, you need to be able to answer everything without the need for it.
Keep in mind that you’re trying to be straightforward and honest rather than rude and blunt.
What is the difference?
It’s true that being honest and being direct might appear to be the same when you’re reading an instant reading, but there’s a difference. Let’s see what it is:
Truthfulness: “I want to be with someone that accepts me for who I am, and who understands that there are some things that I do not want to change.”
Bluntness: “I will never change for you no matter how much you ask.”
The second approach is an excellent illustration of how you can respond to “what are you looking for in a relationship”. Naturally, you can only do this so you are trying to make people feel uncomfortable.
Yes, you must be transparent. However, remember that the other person does not know what you’re about. If you’re in their way, it’s likely they’ll ignore you.
They could have been interested had you been not so rude.
Remember You’re Actually Looking For A Person
We often talk in similar ways about the sexual aspects of our lives. We usually claim that our relationship is the same way. Or, we might say we’re searching for this or that kind of relationship.
The most important thing to keep in mind is people build connections. In other words, you’re searching for someone else. This is likely to determine how you communicate what you’re looking for.
Instead of telling someone: “I’m looking for a relationship where we go out a lot.”
What do you think “I’m a social butterfly and having time with my friends is extremely important for me. You must also be someone who loves having people around.”
It’s much simpler for people to grasp what you want from them, as opposed to discussing a situation they’re a part of.
Furthermore, communicating your expectations on a more personal level may be more manageable than linking your expectations on a bigger scale (in this case, the idea of the concept of a relationship).
Yes, if someone does not think they fit in the category you’ve defined They’ll leave however this is exactly what you’d like in this case.
Don’t worry about driving people away, this is the only way to ensure that the people who are perfect with you can have “room” to find you.
In the same way, remember that finding one another is a continuous process. Human beings aren’t simple and are always growing to be in a relationship, too.
It’s crucial to be able to communicate and continue asking the right questions..
Concrete Examples Of How To Respond To What Are You Looking In A Relationship
These are just some thoughts concerning things that are general in their scope. They’ll typically be discussed when trying to connect with people. Some of them could quickly become into a debate.
Now that you’ve got a good idea of how to structure your criteria let’s look at the various examples of how an entire section of a profile for a date will appear.
It’s true that this could work in the real world when you’re having a cup of coffee with someone. Just a few tweaks here and there are required.
In the interest of being transparent Here’s the truth: yes, you will be bombarded with a hateful messages. As long as you’re honest and transparent it is inevitable.
People will send you messages about your being a religious hooligan or a nazi or communist, someone who is a loner and has zero friends. Or contact you to show that what you’ve written is not true and you shouldn’t be embarrassed about it.
It’s a part of life, and you’ll need to accept it. If you’ve got any personal preferences, opinions, or communicate your ideas, there will be someone be able to disagree.
The quicker you can declare with confidence that you’re a believer in something or say that this is what you believe and, if you disagree with someone else, you, they’re free to leave more relaxed and happy you’ll be.
Don’t, and we don’t overstate this enough be involved in useless online battles. You’re who you are and you’re searching for the right kind of person.
Insane arguments will only cause you to believe there’s nobody available to help those who are false.
However specific an individual or the person you’re, your perfect match is out there which is statistically proven.
Wrapping It Up
In our opinion is the best way to answer “what are you looking for in a relationship”. This will cut through the noise that comes with dating and allow you to concentrate on the most important thing in a relationship: finding the one individual, without attracting lots of them.
When you’ve completed it your work, it’s not done. It’s just the starting.
The relationship can be extremely rewarding, however, only if you make them work. Why not take a look at this list of 150 questions you can ask your partner and yourself to improve your relationship?
After that, take a look at our game of cards that can be played replayable for couples called Better Topics. We developed it using all the principles and values that are discussed in this article and were inspired by our own marriage.
It’s a great and entertaining method of helping you discuss the most important aspects of life.