Experts say this article will discuss the red flags in your relationship.
They may be right if they claim that love is blind.
People often don’t see the faults of their partners when they are in love. Or they may not see them but they won’t recognize them. This is why toxic relationships can develop over time.
Remember the Money Heist scene, in which Raquel Murillo describes her ex-husband’s gradual abuse of her?
She told the professor.
Abuse is not the beginning of toxic relationships. It would be a shame to be in a relationship that is abusive if it were like that. It’s actually the exact opposite. You fall in love with someone charming and intelligent at the beginning. They make you feel like the center of everything.
Love Bombing: How Everything Begin
This is a great description of abusive relationships. This dynamic is often referred to as love bombing.
Keisha Pruden, the therapist, explains that love bombing is when someone is more attentive and loving to you. They are open to all you do.
Love bombing is the act of a person lavishing you with compliments and attention, and adoring you without knowing you. It can feel too good to be true.
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This behavior, while it may seem romantic and appealing to many people, can also be grooming for a narcissist. Pruden says that narcissists use love bombing in relationships to seduce people, gain their trust and then gradually tear them down emotionally.
Many abusers don’t realize that the first love-bombing phase is often what caused them to fail to see the red flags.
Dr. Brenda Wade says that red flags can be difficult to spot in the beginning stages of a relationship. Both individuals get caught up in the excitement of new love, and flags can often be overlooked or missed.
Ashera De Rosa, the therapist, said that it goes beyond whether they call their exes crazy, or are rude to wait for staff. It’s important to reflect on how you feel about the treatment you are receiving as a couple progresses.
According to relationship experts, these are nine red flags that you shouldn’t ignore in a relationship.
#1 Relationship Red Flag: You and your partner should never have arguments
Lack of arguments is one of the most serious red flags in a relationship.
It might sound great to have a partner who isn’t afraid of you arguing. Pruden says that this could be a sign of more than one thing.
Your mate will suppress your anger and explode at the most inopportune moments.
You may feel that your partner has lost their power over abusive relationships and you have learned to silence them.
Pruden states, “Either situation is not healthy for them”
Relationship Red Flag #2 – Your partner makes you feel guilty for spending time with your family and friends
If your partner is irritable when you spend time together with your family or friends, it’s a major red flag in a relationship.
This is not a good sign. It’s also a sign of a lack of respect. This is a sign of distrust.
Marquetta Sims says, “If they try to make it difficult for you to spend time with other people, particularly friends and family members that were in your life before the relationship started, that’s a red flag.”
It’s important to prioritize your relationship with your partner.
Sims says that while romantic relationships are important, they are not to be the only thing that matters. Sims also explains that partners should not pressure you to give up on your relationship. Sims suggests that your partner shouldn’t tell you that your relationship is hurting your partner because of other relationships. This is also true for platonic friendships.
Relationship Red Flag #3: They don’t allow you to express your thoughts, feelings, or emotions
If your partner doesn’t allow you the freedom to express your feelings, thoughts, or emotions, it is a major red flag in a marriage.
Tatyana Dyachenko, a therapist, explains that communication is key to any relationship. If you don’t feel safe expressing yourself, then it is a problem.”
Dyachenko says that you need to ask yourself “What happens when your partner tries to communicate your feelings?” This is a red flag if they become defensive and try to shut you down or make it seem crazy. You should listen to someone if you care deeply about them.
Relationship Red Flag #4 – Their Relationship with Their Family Is Contentious
Our relationship with our family members can have an indirect impact on our relationship with our partners.
This means that we may be more inclined to copy certain dynamics from a toxic relationship we had with one of our siblings or parents when we interact with our significant others.
Pruden says, “While it may seem like it won’t affect you,” it will. Why? We learn from what we see as children. This behavior is carried into adulthood, and we continue to practice it until it becomes too painful. What you see in the dysfunctional family dynamics of your partner may also manifest in your own relationship.
Relationship Red Flag #5 – They are Unable to Say Sorry
Carmel Jones explains that being unable to recognize and apologize for your mistakes is a warning sign.
Imagine this: You call your partner out for something they did that you were unhappy about. Instead of apologizing, they become defensive and make you feel guilty. This is generally not a good sign.
Jones says, “This is an indication of emotional insanity.” While conflict is part of healthy relationships, it’s important to be able to resolve conflict without being defensive or mean. It’s a red flag if your partner is not willing to apologize or gets defensive when you bring up things that are bothering you.
#6: They don’t want you to post certain things on social media
You might be in an abusive or unhealthy relationship if you fear sharing that story on Instagram for fear of offending your partner.
Jones explains that this is “a modern form of emotional abuse and control.” It might seem sweet and endearing to your partner at first, when they don’t want you posting something on social media. But it should be a red flag. You decide what you post. They shouldn’t be allowed to have any input.”
#7: They Gaslight you
Gaslighting is one of the most serious red flags in a relationship.
Kimberly Wallace, the trauma therapist, explains that “Gaslighting” is a form of psychological abuse in which the perpetrator uses a particular form of manipulation to cause their partner to question their reality or memory.
These are some examples:
If a partner verbally abuses you, but later denies it,
You have a partner who shares a secret with you and then denies it months later.
Your partner will use your insecurities to make their point or convince you of something false.
Your partner telling you something that you don’t know about.
Wallace warns that this is dangerous behavior because it can have a profound impact on one’s perception of reality, self-esteem, and confidence.
#8: You Don’t Feel Like Yourself
Although this isn’t one of the most obvious red flags it’s important to be aware.
Josh Hudson, a licensed therapist, says that recognizing yourself is a red flag in a relationship.
“You don’t feel like you are yourself and you don’t feel comfortable being who you are.” While you don’t answer texts, you’re unsure about your future plans. You snap at them more often than usual. You find it difficult to laugh at all the things you used to enjoy. Hudson says that if you are dreadful when they call you or hear the keys in the lock sound, it is the kiss of death for any relationship.
He also said, “Go out to dinner with your friends.” If you feel like you are finally being yourself, it is a sign that your relationship is not worth it. Do not confuse compatibility with chemistry. Chemistry is like a flame thrower. Compatibility is when you and your partner bring out your best.
#9: They Separate You from Family and Friends
Hudson says that isolation can creep in when your boyfriend or girlfriend starts to pull you away from your family and friends, your support network, and tether you closer to them.”
Hudson says that they may use sentences to take you out of your life.
“Why do they hang out with you?” They are such losers.
“They want us to split up.”
“They are totally against us.”
Hudson says, “Isolation means sowing doubts about everyone in your pre-relationship lives.” Healthy love is two people who are independent, who enjoy spending time together and who still keep in touch with the people and activities that they care about.
It is important to maintain independence in your relationships over time.
You can also do this by spending time together and encouraging your partner.
Relationship red flags: Final thoughts
To be in a healthy relationship, you don’t have to suffer verbal or physical abuse.
These red flags are clear indicators that your relationship is in serious trouble and you need to address them.