So how can you tell if you’re being thrown to the curb gracefully by a girl, even when she doesn’t use the words and tell you straight that she isn’t interested in dating you?
Let’s look at the signs that show you are definitely in the friend zone with a girl.
1. You’re so unfunny!
Even as friends, most girls will laugh at a guy’s jokes. This is just a completely normal social interaction. If your crush laughs hysterically at your jokes, do not immediately jump to the conclusion that they are crushing back on you.
But on the other hand, if your lady friend NEVER or hardly ever laughs at your jokes, now would be the time to start worrying that you might not even be on a friend’s level. Maybe more like acquaintances.
2. Asks you about other women
If your dream girl is constantly asking you about other women when you hang out, there are two basic trains of thought here.
Either she is trying to find out what kind of woman you like to date, to see if she falls into that profile, or to know if you’re available at the time. However, this is probably the optimistic version.
Realistically she is probably trying to hint towards you to try going after one of these women. *Red flag alert: Asking you about other women is one thing, encouraging you to go talk to one of them is not a good sign for you, buddy!*
3. Addresses you as a ‘friend’
This is probably one of the worst signs you’re being friend zoned by a girl. Both of you may spend all day together every day, yet the way she introduces you to her parents or her friends is a huge sign of her thoughts about you on a romantic level.
Any introductions like “Matt is such a good friend” or “I absolutely LOVE John, he is my bestie,” and you should probably accept your fate in the Friend Zone.
4. She avoids being seen with you in romantic settings
While out, she avoids being seen with you so people don’t get the wrong idea. Maybe you’re wondering to yourself why you see so much of her throughout the day, but never at night. She is always busy when you ask her to the mail, or to grab a bite to eat.
But the next day in class or at work, she is Miss Chatty Box with you again. At least you know, she’s yours only till it’s time to leave for the day.
5. She talks about her hookups
Possibly the worst part of being friend zoned by a girl is having to hear all about the other men she is totally digging, while you are not one of them.
Knowing these guys aren’t right for her *obviously, you should be the one with her* doesn’t matter, because she can’t see past the nice car, that ripped body, or that gorgeous smile.
6. Three’s not a crowd
If you invite her somewhere, she brings along a friend. If this happens once, maybe it is a coincidence, if it happens again, then there is no doubt about where you stand in terms of friendship versus exclusive relationship.
You invite her to a movie, or to dinner, or basically invite her anywhere that is remotely private, and somehow it ends up turning into a group event without your knowledge.
This is just another tactic women use to say “Sorry, I’m not interested” without ever uttering the words.
7. She’s drunk, and still no signs!
You finally got her to the bar, you have her alone in public, just the 2 of you, and after a few drinks, she still wants nothing to do with you!
No slip-ups about how crazy it would be if both of you started dating. No inching closer as the drinks flow to get closer into your arms. You’ve probably been friend zoned by this girl and it’s not looking good, man, not looking good at all!
8. There is no physical contact between the two of you
A hug does not count here, what are we, 12?! If you hug each other every time you see one another, you cannot really believe she is interested. We’re just moving on to the next point, and hope you get the hint.
9. She’s so casual
You can tell that she isn’t making any attempt with her appearance when you see her. Both of you head out to grab a bite to eat, she walks up to your car in sweat pants and a pullover jacket with no makeup or earrings?
Again, not looking too promising here, friend.
10. You watch a whole movie!
The worst thing that can happen when watching a movie with her at home is… well, just watching the whole film! That move just SCREAMS Friend Zone!
If she’s even remotely interested in you, she may either inch closer or cuddle up with you.
If you are more of the direct type, try placing your arm around her back, or making a gesture to reach for her hand. Any movement away from you should let you know where you stand.
11. Brother from another mother?
Being referred to as a “bestie” is a terrible situation for you to be in. But being referred to as “the brother she never had” is even worse, because who in their right mind would ever think about a “family member” in a dating scenario? You’ve definitely been friend zoned by this girl!
12. Shopping time
Does she ask you to go shopping with her on a regular basis? Now let’s clarify, if you’re being invited to do some lingerie shopping, this may be a great opportunity for you!
But shoe shopping, handbag shopping, carrying her purchases through the mall while following her around like a puppy dog, that is where things start to look grim.
13. Oh-so-cute nicknames
What is more emasculating than letting a woman you love call you “Mikeypoo” in public? That is a cruel, cruel way to have your heart delicately ripped out of your chest.
14. She needs your advice
If she asks for tips on what guys are looking for in a woman, she isn’t asking that to woo you, we can promise you that.
She clearly has her eyes on another guy and is wondering how to make him notice her. But if you want to keep telling yourself she’s talking about you, go ahead, whatever helps you sleep at night!
15. Sharing a bed
You have shared a bed with this person and yet, did not take part in any type of physical activity. You finally get her alone in your room and she is “too tired” or “so exhausted from the long day” and wants to head right to bed.
If you are bold, try and initiate something once both of you get into bed, but you are most likely looking at a much more direct rejection taking place within the next few seconds!
You’ve been friend zoned by this girl, for now, you need to accept. If you don’t, and still try to make a move, you may even lose her as a friend! [Read: 20 dirty questions to text a girl and make her wet]
16. She tries to set you up with her friends
If she is constantly telling you how perfect you are for this friend or that friend, what she really is trying to say is you are not perfect for HER!
17. You always end up doing favors for her
Do you remember the last time you covered for her during work? Traded shifts? Helped her study for her final exam at the expense of her own studying? Giving her rides from place to place without being invited to these places. Wake up, man, wake up! [Read: 19 wily signs she only wants your attention and not a relationship with you]
18. You’re her shoulder
The worst way to realize you have most definitely been friend zoned by a girl is when you end up consoling her each time she has a breakup.
Right after every breakup, who is the person she comes crying too? The person who she wants to sit on a couch with, shares a gallon bucket of ice cream while crying the whole time wondering where things went wrong? [Read: 6 ways to kiss your friend accidentally and get away with it!]
19. She avoids being alone with you in private
When a girl likes you, she wants to be alone with you – in private. The reason for that is because she is interested in you and hopes you will make a move on her.
But if you are in the friend zone with a girl, then she will avoid being alone with you because she doesn’t want to give you the wrong idea. So, if you find that she is always declining your invitation over to your place in favor of going out in public, then that is not a good sign.
20. She tries not to get too close to you or touch you
If a girl doesn’t have any romantic interest in a guy, then she is very conscious about how close she sits next to him or even walks near him.
She thinks that if the physical distance is too small, then you will think she’s giving you a hint that she likes you. So, if she never touches you *unless you initiate a hug* or gets physically in your personal zone, then she is doing that on purpose to send you a message.
21. Other body languages
Body language tells you everything you need to know about how someone feels. That’s because nonverbal communication is responsible for 80-90% of the meaning of a message.
So, watch her eye contact, and body movements *as we just mentioned*and anything else about her body that is trying to tell you that she is uninterested in you romantically.
22. You do most of the reaching out first
Sure, you are excited to talk to her because you like her. But after a while, you notice that you are the one who always reaches out to her first.
She probably responds positively and politely, but she never texts or calls you first. That’s because you are not on her mind as much as she is on yours. Plus, she could be talking to other guys that she is romantically interested in.
23. She’s inconsistent with her communication patterns
Maybe she does reach out to you first. So, you might think that’s a good sign, right? Well, maybe and maybe not. If she does, then watch her communication patterns.
A girl who likes you will be consistent with communicating with you. But a girl who isn’t will blow hot and cold. One minute you think she likes you because she reaches out to you a lot, and then the next she will go silent for a long time.
24. She doesn’t treat you very well
As we said above, you might always be doing things for her. You probably do that hoping that she will eventually see you as a romantic possibility. But after a while, you might start feeling used.
If she doesn’t appreciate you and you feel like the only reason she’s friends with you is to see what you can do for her, then that’s a terrible sign you’ve been friendzoned by a girl.
25. She doesn’t flirt with you
When a girl likes a guy, she flirts with him. She will smile, have a lot of eye contact, “accidentally” touch him, and say things like how cute he is.
So, if you’re trying to flirt with her but you feel like it’s falling on deaf ears, then she is probably purposely trying to not give you the wrong idea.
What to do if you have been friendzoned by a girl you like
Okay, so after you have read all of the signs that you are being friendzoned by a girl, what should you do? Should you keep trying harder? Or should you give up and move on?
A lot of guys think they should try harder. But in reality, that’s not a good idea.
If this girl doesn’t have any romantic interest in you, why would you torture yourself by trying to change her mind? Because the truth is, you probably won’t be able to – ever. [Read: How to get over someone you never dated but loved and free yourself]
So, you should forget about her and find someone who actually does like you. After all, why would you want to date someone who only barely likes you? No one wants that!
Go out and find someone who appreciates you and is excited to have you as a boyfriend in their life.
It’s time to walk away…
If all of these signs have led you to conclude that she’s not interested, then just book yourself a one-way ticket to the Friend Zone already and no, there is no need *or way* to buy a return ticket.
Now obviously some of these signs and indicators are definitely worse than others, but if you can even check off a few items on this list, it is time to come back to reality.
She just is not interested in you in the way you wish she was, and the faster you come to this realization by using these clear signs that you’ve been friend zoned by a girl, the sooner you can move on, or stay just friends without any secret agendas.